In my many years studying Kabbalah, one of the most valuable things I ever learned was a response to the question: How do you know you are on the right spiritual path? And my teacher answered: “You have a heightened yet loving awareness of your flaws.”

We all have flaws. As someone told me once, “We’re all annoying to someone.” That may be a hard truth to swallow for some; however, the sooner you do, the easier and better your life can become.

Flaws are part of the human condition, yet we spend much of our precious time hiding them, denying or suppressing them. It’s exhausting and like thinking you will avoid death. Nobody has. The same can be said about flaws.

You are most likely not the chosen one or the few amongst us who do not have flaws. And that, I believe, is by design. Flaws awaken you to what can be transformed for a more fulfilling and abundant life. A next step and roadmap for you. So, the secret is not to hide, deny, or suppress them. Instead, embrace them!

When we hide, deny, or suppress our flaws, the ego becomes our driving force—ego consciousness. The ego gives us a ‘safety’ net that doesn’t serve us (and in reality is not so safe), like pessimism and excuses that keep us small, stuck, and repeatedly making the same choices that deliver undesirable results.

So, how do we move from ego consciousness to a heart-centered life—soul consciousness that lifts us from darkness into light and a more meaningful and abundant life?

Well, first, remember that darkness is not the absence of light. Darkness is the concealment of light. Think of curtains that only need to be opened to bring light into the space. So, let’s open the curtains, shall we?

Embrace your flaws and make them your BFFs (Best Friends Forever)!

Your flaws are neither bad nor good. They are human responses to past trauma and pain. Think of them like a crack in the highway that, over time, is inevitable. The crack needs repair—something to fill in those cracks.

So, name your flaws and do a little repair work with heart qualities like care, appreciation, and compassion. Choose heart qualities over ego-based ones that will always tell you something is wrong, you’re not good enough, you’re not the one, and the system is rigged against you. We can repurpose those flaws into goodwill for ourselves and others with heart qualities.

Channel envy into motivation to crystallize your goals. If there is envy, there is something you desire. Define the goal and steps to take to achieve it. Then go for it (you might need help, a class, or a mentor), and watch envy become the catalyst for a better version of yourself and an accomplishment you will be most proud of. That’s a shift from the ‘safety’ net of ego to a fully-lived life and soul consciousness.

Turn worry into an intelligent or a managed concern. Worrying depletes you as a low-frequency feeling creates more stress and a limited perspective. With heart qualities like care and appreciation—high-frequency feelings, we leave the worries behind. We intelligently and proactively consider the situation and the best possible solutions. Many times, your heart will tell you to do nothing at all!

Anger is a fuel that can be converted into action. You might be angry because, in the past, you have suppressed your opinions and desires. Feel a heart quality such as appreciation or compassion and shift anger into positive self-expression. Everyone wins when you do. Put yourself on the winning side with a heart quality and watch your confidence grow.

Laziness can signal the need for greater self-care and love. Designate time for yourself to do what you love to do. Maybe you need more rest. Maybe you need to fuel your body better, emotionally and nutritionally. As energy is on the RISE, so are you.

Impatience is a fear of what you might not get or lose. Breathe in inner ease, calm, or appreciation. Pick a heart quality that lifts your spirits and energy. Now, notice the fear dissipating as your heart’s intelligence and intuitive guidance provide a better response (than impatience) for you and all concerned.

As Ernest Hemingway once said:

“We are all broken. That’s how the light gets in.”

So, welcome to humanity, and let the light in!

Live and learn.

Learn and grow.

Grow and RISE to embrace your flaws and turn them into what you desire.

Step into the light. The world is waiting for your whole self to emerge.

I like to share tools to facilitate the process and help you move from ego to soul consciousness, embrace your flaws, humanity, and a solid road ahead. So here are two to get you well on your way.

Pause

Stop the pattern of and need for instant gratification that comes from fear, lack, and doubt. Take a few slow, deep breaths in and out of your heart. Breathe in the feelings of ease, calm, and peace for a couple of minutes. Feel the state of neutrality and notice how much better you can feel in just a few minutes as you pause. You may notice a much wider perspective, calm, and ease that have replaced feelings like anger, judgment, overwhelm, and frustration.

Restriction

Restrict the old, unhealthy, and triggered behavior patterns. Feel what it’s like to consciously restrict that behavior that creates chaos, confusion, and pain in your life. Feel your inner strength growing. Feel more masterful each time you restrict behavior that does not serve you and others. Notice you are moving from the back seat to the driver seat again. You have greater control of your life when you proactively restrict behavior that doesn’t serve you and choose another road.

I still mess up, and most likely, so will you. However, the more you Pause, the more you Restrict behavior that does not align with your core values and goals, the stronger you become. The strongest amongst us are not those without fear or flaws. They are those who override them.

Recognizing your flaws in a loving way, like a BFF, gives you the gift of freedom. Freedom from the pain and suffering of years gone by sourced from ego consciousness that kept you from the promise of a heart-centered, fulfilling, abundant, and loving life.

Just as you would embrace a loved one, embrace your flaws. Hug yourself (often), fill in the cracks with heart qualities, and take the high road ahead.